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author's note: here is the paper that i had to write for theology class. it's called a "personal mission statement." i wrote it in an hour. it's awesome. well, i think it's awesome. feel free to read it and comment (honestly) on it cuz i'm just interested in hearing what you have to think of it, as well as my bizzare inner psyche. it's kinda long. so go nuts.

Angela Papaleo
April 28, 2003
Period 2
Personal Mission Statement

My Mission: To be The Coolest Person in The World

It’s very difficult for me to write this paper. I mean the very first reflection question is “Who has been one of the most influential people in my life?” That’s a sign right there that this paper is going to be really hard to write. It’s not that I don’t have any influential people in my life…ok so maybe it is. That’s not to say that there aren’t any people in my life who haven’t made a good impression on me, it just means that I really don’t find myself wanting to follow in anyone’s footsteps. And why would I want to, anyways? I’m not them. I don’t want what they have. I want what I want. Which I think brings me directly to the next reflection: What I’d like to be.

Ah, another really hard question. I remember I wrote my personal essay for college applications about how I wanted to be an actress. Sure, who knows, maybe I still wanna be an actress. But then I start thinking about how I want to be rich and famous, and yeah being an actress is a good route to take if I want to gain publicity and lots of dollars. But then my mind starts wandering and I find myself second-guessing myself. Am I good enough? Do I have talent? Am I pretty enough? Let’s face it folks, these days you gotta be a blonde twig to make it in the entertainment business and I am by no means a blonde twig. Oy vey I tell ya, it aint easy bein green…I mean…me. So let’s skip over my insecurities for a bit and go right to: What I’d like to do.

Well, I think I’d like to make art. Sure, I can be an artist. Anyone can be an artist; at least that’s what G-D (Ms. Gordon-Davis), the fabulous art teacher/head of the art department, says. And I believe her. Look at Jackson Pollock! All he did was splash paint around and it got him not only notoriety as an artist and a movie about his life! Some people have all the luck. He doesn’t even have talent! Grr he just angers me…but enough about Pollock, this paper’s about me. So yes, I would like to do art. Now that answers that question, so the next one is: What I’d like to have.

All I ever wanted is duct tape! Yeah! I could eat it every day! Yeah!

No wait, I’m sorry. I lie. I don’t want duct tape, nor would I eat it every day. It’s just kinda funny because as I’m writing this paper I’m listening to this CD by a band called Ophur, and I’m listening to this song called “Dinosaurs and Candy Cats.” There’s this one part where they sing, “All I ever wanted is duct tape/Yeah/I could eat it every day/Yeah” and it was just funny because it was a coincidence. But I digress.

What would I like to have? Well I’d like to have a lot of things. I might want a husband. That would be kinda nice, y'know, to get married and have kids. Well maybe not kids but it would be nice to have someone that I love be by my side. And then of course I’d like a really nice place to live, maybe a loft on the north side of Chicago or in New Mexico or Arizona or California, someplace warm. And of course, I couldn’t have a nice place to live without money, so yes, I’d like to be very wealthy. And I’d like to have a lot of friends, but frankly, I don’t see that being a problem for me cuz I tend to talk to people. Some people I know are always saying how they never talked to anyone in high school (and still don’t) and that’s why only a few people are their friends, and I think that’s stupid. Why wouldn’t you talk to anyone? Why wouldn’t you make friends with the person next to you? Sure, you don’t have to be their best friend in the end, but they don’t even go out of their way to wave to people they sit behind or anything like that. It’s nuts, I say. What else do I want? Ooh, I want a good career! I want success! I want to be taken seriously! I want to be the most avant-garde artist of my time! I want respect as an artist, notoriety, articles about me, interviews with Barbara Walters, and a syndicated column written by myself in every major newspaper in the world. Yes, that’s what I want. And maybe I’d like a movie about my life too, or a TV show. It’d be a comedy (of course) and I’d write it along with my friends from high school and college. Man, I’m gonna be the coolest person in the world.

Upon reading this, I have realized that a lot of the stuff I’ve written is absolute fantasy. Big time. But hey, I have a right to dream, don’t I? And who says that I can’t have any of those things? No one! The only person who’s going to stop me from being the coolest person in the world is me. So let’s go back to the part that I skipped: my insecurities.

I am really insecure; I always have been. Not just about my looks but also my personality and talents. I’m always wondering if the compliment that someone’s paying me isn’t just them making fun of me or them wanting something from me. And I’ve always wondered if I’m good enough, I’m smart enough and if doggone it, people like me. And I guess I am, and I guess people do like me because I have a lot of friends and fairly good grades. So this is what I need to do to become the coolest person in the world: I just need to trust that I am the coolest person in the world and am indeed good enough, smart enough, and that doggone it, people like me.